Kirk Gleason: Excuse me, is that good?
Woman: Yes.
Kirk Gleason: And what is that?
Woman: Meat loaf.
Kirk Gleason: Ok, so this meat loaf... is it a romantic food for you? Is it getting you hot?
Kirk: Luke is peeking!
Luke: It means you're peeking too, snitch!
Kirk Gleason: Oh, I can tell you what they're saying.
Lorelai Gilmore: How?
Kirk Gleason: I read lips. My girlfriend taught me. It's so we can have quiet time and keep a conversation going at the same time. Okay: she just said "Hardwood sponge is the authority of the hostile biographer." And then he responded, "Just phone cords to original samovars."
Lorelai Gilmore: Are you okay?
Kirk Gleason: My mother has developed a knee condition. It makes her knees enormous. Yesterday I spent all morning cutting holes in her pants so she could sit. But other than that, and the dyspeptic parrot problem, everything is fine.
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